Tips From the Front Line

1. Reserve the right to change your mind. The learning curve is steep and we have come to understand that the only bad decision is one that has not been fully vetted by friends, neighbours, personal trainers, baristas, medical doctors, dog walkers and random people we met along the way.
   
   
2. Find a good banker and cozy up to him/her. Find out significant milestones such as birthday, wedding anniversary date, the name of the family pet and where they get their car serviced. Take up skiing and run into their family on the slopes of Big White or Apex. Show up in Palm Springs on the same golf course. In other words – get familiar. You have just added a new member to your family. This relationship is now more important than your marriage.   
   
   
3. Put the kids to work and pay them in wine and dividends while you float out vague promises of future share issues. This only works if your kids still live at home and you did not previously ensure that they obtained a master’s degree in economics, or became a chartered accountant or investment banker.
   
   
4. Rent the lower part of your home to increase your monthly income and to help offset your 2nd mortgage payments. Ensure that the people that you rent your home to like wine but not so much that they don’t go to bed at 8pm when you do. 
   
   
5. Get a beat-up old SUV. Use this to make wine deliveries. Put a “National Rifle Association” sticker on the car to prevent towing while you are double parked. No one wants to tow the SUV of a possessed person who may own guns.   
   
   
6. Learn to “out-rant” restaurateurs and private wine-store operators. Complain about liquor monopolies, all levels of government, HST, and the new .05 guideline. Go a step further by complaining about cross-provincial shipping, the building permit fees, the wine authority, and the tax grab that was made with the addition of a manufacturer’s license at your vineyard. If you play your cards right, buyers will send a courier to pick up their wine order avoiding the need for you to visit. This will save tons of time and allow you to get a part-time job.   
   
   
7. Consider a Labrador Retriever puppy. It appears that the first Labrador Retriever (Sir Echo of Summerland) was the most effective marketing tool in the war chest. Name the new dog “Friendly”—then when you call out “Echo Friendly,” people will think you are environmentally aware and you may be able to apply for carbon credits. 
   
   
8. Hire a young, eager perston to be YOU on Facebook and Twitter. Empower them to be a better, smarter, more fun and more dynamic version of YOU. As authenticity is key with social media ensure they do not post or tweet anything past 8pm, as those who know you know that you are not up at that hour. 
   
   
9. Cancel subscriptionsto all magazines with the topic of retirement. Do NOT read the books “Rich Dads Retire Young” “How to Retire Happy, Wild and Free,” or “Where to Retire.” Face it, you won’t be joining your retired friends in Palm Springs unless it’s to pay a sneak visit to your vacationing banker.
   
   
10. Remember to never make more wine annually than you are capable of consuming yourself.